Physical and spiritual in marriage

Both a Physical and spiritual union (with spiritual of more importance, though physical has due importance)

A married couple should, as with angels in heaven, a life of joy, unity, and physical and mental friendship

"In this glorious [Bahá'í] Cause the life of a married couple should resemble the life of the angels in heaven—a life full of joy and spiritual delight, a life of unity and concord, a friendship both mental and physical."

('Abdu’l-Bahá, Compilation on Family Life, no. 43)

Love Between Husband and Wife

"The friends of God must so live and conduct themselves and evince such excellence of character and conduct, as to make others astonished. The love between husband and wife should not be purely physical, nay rather it must be spiritual and heavenly. These two souls should be considered as one soul. How difficult it would be to divide a single soul! Nay, great would be the difficulty!

"In short, the foundation of the Kingdom of God is based upon harmony and love, oneness, relationship and union, not upon differences, especially between husband and wife."

('Abdu'l-Bahá: Family Life, A Compilation of the Universal House of Justice, in Lights of Guidance, no. 753)

The Physical Aspect of Marital Union is Subordinate to the Moral and Spiritual Purposes and Functions

"The institution of marriage, as established by Bahá'u'lláh, while giving due importance to the physical aspect of marital union considers it as subordinate to the moral and spiritual purposes and functions with which it has been invested by an all-wise and loving Providence. Only when these different values are given each their due importance, and only on the basis of the subordination of the physical to the moral, and the carnal to the spiritual can such excesses and laxity in marital relations as our decadent age is so sadly witnessing be avoided, and family life be restored to its original purity, and fulfill the true function for which it has been instituted by God."

(From a letter written on behalf of Shoghi Effendi to an individual believer, May 8, 1939: Family Life, pp. 18-19, in Lights of Guidance, no. 1264), also under Family Life, A Compilation of the Universal House of Justice, in Lights of Guidance, no. 754 as "The Institution of Marriage")

Bahá'í Union Must Be a True Relationship that Will Endure

"When, therefore, the people of Bahá undertake to marry, the union must be a true relationship, a spiritual coming together as well as a physical one, so that throughout every phase of life, and in all the worlds of God, their union will endure; for this real oneness is a gleaming out of the love of God."

('Abdu'l-Bahá, Selections from the Writings of 'Abdu'l-Bahá, p. 117, in Lights of Guidance, no. 1266)

Husband and wife to be united physically and spiritually

"The true marriage of Bahá'ís is this, that husband and wife should be united both physically and spiritually, that they may ever improve the spiritual life of each other, and may enjoy everlasting unity throughout all the worlds of God. This is Bahá'í marriage."

('Abdu'l-Bahá, Selections from the Writings of 'Abdu'l-Bahá, p. 118)

World is submerged today in exaggeration of physical love's importance; one may have normal sex life in marriage

"The world today is submerged, amongst other things, in an over-exaggeration of the importance of physical love, and a dearth of spiritual values. In as far as possible the believers should try to realize this and rise above the level of their fellow-men who are, typical of all decadent periods in history, placing so much over-emphasis on the purely physical side of mating. Outside of their normal, legitimate married life they should seek to establish bonds of comradeship and love which are eternal and founded on the spiritual life of man, not on his physical life. This is one of the many fields in which it is incumbent on the Bahá'ís to set the example and lead the way to a true human standard of life, when the soul of man is exalted and his body but the tool for his enlightened spirit. Needless to say this does not preclude the living of a perfectly normal sex life in its legitimate channel of marriage."

(From a letter dated 28 September 1941 written on behalf of Shoghi Effendi to an individual believer, Chaste and Holy Life, A, no. 32)

Friendship both mental and physical

"In this glorious Cause the life of a married couple should resemble the life of the angels in heaven--a life full of joy and spiritual delight, a life of unity and concord, a friendship both mental and physical. The home should be orderly and well-organized. Their ideas and thoughts should be like the rays of the sun of truth and the radiance of the brilliant stars in the heavens. Even as two birds they should warble melodies upon the branches of the tree of fellowship and harmony. They should always be elated with joy and gladness and be a source of happiness to the hearts of others. They should set an example to their fellow-men, manifest true and sincere love towards each other and educate their children in such a manner as to blazon the fame and glory of their family."

(From a talk of Abdu'l-Bahá: Family Life, A Compilation of the Universal House of Justice, p. 13, in Lights of Guidance, no. 733)

See also

• Satisfying one's marriage partner